I smiled, a homeless bottle for a homeless girl. I caught up with Amber in the produce aisle. She was putting some lettuce into the cart. ‘Salad ok...y?’ she asked. ‘Sounds good, though we’ll need some dressing,’ I replied. I saw Tom out of the corner of my eye. He disappeared quickly, but I believe he was watching Amber. I had never known Tom to be so blatant. Maybe it was the purple hair. We don’t get that many punk looks out here. I decided to stay close to Amber for the rest of our visit. . After my time in the joint all the drugs and liquor was purged from my body. I hurt often and needed to escape, but I found ways to escape which weren't so self-destructive. The prison psychologist would be proud of me. He called it the grand substitution. For me it was a man, a woman or a dildo. Well not always, sometimes it was just looking at pictures of Country Store before I put my hand to it. So I guess you could say I found my release in some of the same things Roland had. He could never. She would come to my house with our parents permission any time she wanted so much so that since she didn't have a washer at her house she washed her clothes at ours.Her panties were always left in the basket and I would smell them. I was a pervert who loved scat and unwashed girls so I would spend hours smelling them.One day she caught me red handed and screamed and ran across the street. Now of course I'd expect her to tell my and hers parents and I would never get to see her underwear. Val said “what do you mean by trashy?” Jessie replied “ do you own a garterbelt and very sheer stocking? Do you have 4 inch stilettos? How about a skirt that would just barely cover your stocking tops or maybe a side slit?” Val was stunned and said “No!”“Well women have to do the changing, it’s the natural order of things. If he started dressing sexy, it wouldn’t help his sex life much, but if you do, he wouldn’t be able to wait to get you in bed or over the hood of the car!” Jessie said. Val.
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