Do you understand the concept of patronage? I mean, the way it works when you're, well, outside the law." Not completely, I guess," I admitted."Look, ...ack when I was hooking, early on, I mean ... Larry, I hate talking about this to you, but it's been my frame of reference for a lot of years. Does it bother you?"I shrugged. "Honey, like I keep saying, it's who you used to be, not you today. Yeah, I hate that you lived like that, but I hate it a lot worse for you than for me. You know? Say what. I wasn't afraid of losing Emily or Brenda. Even if they both took off and moved thousands of miles away, it wouldn't have been that hard of a blow for me to absorb. I was still dealing with the fact that we were already separated. I had grown used to it, had accepted the fact of it. If I was going to lose them, I wanted it to be over something worthwhile I was trying to get from them both.I knew they both wanted more from me. I wanted more from them too, but on my terms, not theirs. If it. You or your family members insulted me and her so often...”“John, you have a gripe but not this big a gripe,” said Victoria.“Don’t I?” I said, and I was sneering.“John Michael, please, don’t do this to us. My God don’t do this!” said Victoria.“Look, I’ve got to work. Please leave. If I lose my job, I’ll lose my insurance, my apartment and fucking freeze to death on the street if I don’t starve to death first. Okay?” Just leave.“John, okay, we’re going, but this is not over. You thought you were. John pulled on a heavy jacket, heavy pants, boots, a hat, gloves, and polarized goggles, and then got out of the helicopter. To his surprise, even in midsummer, the cold still bit, even through the clothes he was wearing.He lugged the trunks to the exact location, checking a GPS receiver to make sure he was exactly at the right spot. Even just a bit off would cause a failure. He was exhausted at this point, having not slept in twenty four hours, but he was kept awake by his sheer excitement..
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