However she now had her radio going with the earphones on so until I went down there, she’d be lost to the world for the next hour. Being impatient... not wanting to get into an argument, and feeling like pissing her off for a change I decided to check her room without asking permission (a BIG no-no). I stormed in there looking in all the usual places and a few more without finding my tape. That’s when I decided to check her closet (an even bigger no-no but I didn’t care) swinging open the. ’ As I get dressed I notice all the beauty products on her dressing table. No wonder she’s got money problems wasting her benefit money on that… it’s not like it’ll do her any good, unlike some women, because quite frankly you can’t polish a turd. ‘I can’t live without you.’ She mutters in a dreamy manner. ‘Don’t talk crap you stupid bitch… there’s always some desperate facker out there who’ll have you. Right I’m off now… I think I heard a car pull up outside… see you around.’ I walk down the. Hours on end, and I had not beat off. My libido was past intimidated, stomped flat. I might not even have a cock anymore, I thought. I no longer had right to it anyway, nor any right to consider myself masculine in any way. I was a notch south from Mom being Rizzo's eager bitch. I was his bitch too. Somewhere in the midst of this deconstruction of my psyche I fell asleep. The alarm woke me at six.There was no attempt: not to get out of bed, not to remove Rizzo, not to crawl to the bathroom to. One Saturday, the wife had gone to work and as I drove on our drive she was there hanging her washing out.As soon as she saw me she smiled and waved. I got out of the car and went over to talk to her. She looked more beautiful than ever. I asked how she was and she replied she was Ok, then I suggested she came round and she said she couldn't. An hour later I noticed her husband had gone out and she was still sorting out her washing.Popping my head around the door I said "Come here" she smiled.
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